8.06.2012

iwanttodoeverythingawesome

my latest self discovery is that i am a perfectionist. but i'm kind of a weird version of a perfectionist, because i'm also a very fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants kind-of girl, which often warrants a lot of imperfections.

the perfectionist part of me can.not.handle. too much. which is what my life is right now. bottom line: if i can't do everything perfectly, i don't want to do anything at all.

and the worst part, the part that gets me in trouble, is that i want to do EVERYTHING. it's not just that life has given me a lot to do right now (which is part of it), but it's also that there are just so many things that i like and even love doing! so i say yes, yes, yes, and more yes...and then (you can probably guess) i end up crying in yet another staff meeting and this time it's all about how hard it is to be a wife and have a job and do every hobby and hang out with every person that i would like to.

and while in the past week my life has actually had somewhat of a routine to it, and i'm actually doing things i should and want to be doing, there is still so much i'm not doing and i'm just trying to sort it all out. sheesh. it's time for me to make a list. or several.


THINGS I LOVE TO DO:
write.
craft.
help people with crafts.
spend time with people.


THINGS I SHOULD BE DOING:
making dinner.
grocery shopping.
having energy to love and care for my husband.
helping my husband with whatever he needs.
laundry.
cleaning my house.


THINGS THAT I KNOW ARE GOOD FOR ME:
reading the Bible.
journaling to Jesus.
confessing my sin.
running/exercising.


THINGS THAT I HAVEN'T DONE YET THAT HAVE BEEN ON 'THE LIST' FOR YEARS:
painting my bathrooms.
fixing all the slightly damaged clothing we have.
getting our back door fixed.
continuing to de clutter.


THINGS THAT I WISH I WAS BETTER AT:
being a good friend.
being a good family member.
staying calm and collected under stress.
convincing bryan to get me pregnant.


right now. i'm working on 'write.' we'll see what i get to tomorrow.

3 comments:

  1. You can check off being a good family member :)especially a good daughter! I think "warrants" in the first paragraph should be "results in" :)

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  2. Kaylee8/07/2012

    1. you are a good friend to me!
    2. the BR will be done soon and if we work together you'll make dinner too!
    3. you've been rocking exercising. running and volleyball this weekend?

    I'm proud of you.

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  3. I love 'convincing bryan to get me pregnant.' I feel like I'm in a pretty similar boat with you on that one - but then, as soon as I think that Dan's convinced, I get cold feet. This is why God's timing is best and His working in BOTH of our hearts is better than any coercing I can muster. :)

    I've loved catching up on all your blogs! Love hearing from you and all your learning!

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