11.03.2009

a long apology for a long absence

I really enjoy blogging. I love writing. I love sharing about our lives and marriage and journey. And it's totally therapeutic for me to take time to digest things by writing it out.

But I ran into a problem with blogging this past month: I don't want to be a "Ranter."

I personally become so burdened and bogged down after I read a particularly negative anything (blog, facebook status, etc.) written by anyone (friend or not).

Frankly, for me, this past month has been full of hard things, and I haven't had many positive things to say. But I didn't want to bog myself, or anyone reading my blog down with all the negativeness.

Hence, I haven't been blogging much.

I want to stay positive, even in the blogosphere. Don't get me wrong, I don't want to fake a happy attitude, but in my heart I know that even negative things are really good. I know that everything in my life is part of the journey of life and more specifically part of my spiritual growth.

I told one of my good friends that the recent weeks of my life have been ones in which God seems to be tearing me apart. It hurts, but I know its a good hurt. He desires to put me back together His way. This Anthem Band lyric has been speaking loud and clear to me:

"Destroy our hearts so we can recover."

(From, "Take the Day." thanks Ryan Seiler)

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But don't despair, I think I'm on the mend from all the construction God's been doing in my life. I've been learning so much from Him and changing in ways that I really didn't want to. : )

And I have a lot to say about it too! More blogs are coming soon from the Alsbury home!

2 comments:

  1. Suffering, in my experience, always turns into a blessing in some way (even if it's very small). It's just hard to see past the suffering when you're in it. I'm glad God is building you back up. If you ever need someone to talk to, you have my number or we could meet up. I love you!

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  2. Lauren,
    I completely agree! This knowledge is why I always want to stay positive! I know that God is always doing His work in me, even though it may be hard and that is a good reason to rejoice!
    I LOVE YOU TOO!

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